Women

My wise, oldest sister Christy sent this poem to me. It's clever . . .

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ..
a youth she's content to leave behind....

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age....

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .....
a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ....
a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored...

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ...
a feeling of control over her destiny...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to fall in love without losing herself..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
how to quit a job, break up with a lover, and confront a friend without; ruining the friendship...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents..

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
that her childhood may not have been perfect...but it's over...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
what she would and wouldn't do for love or more...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW.. .
whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table.. or a charming Inn in the woods... when her soul needs soothing...

EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW...
What she can and can't accomplish in a day... a month...and a year...


As I read these things I can't help but think of all the things I've learned in only the last ten years, from age 20 - 30. It's so liberating to mature and grow up. I wonder what I would I would have told my 20 year old self?
What do you think every woman should know?

Yesterday the boys said a couple of things that struck me as funny/interesting. They're always saying zany stuff, but these quips made me laugh a little more than usual, and stop to ponder. Hhmmmmm.


Dane is going through a contrary and independant phase, exploring the boundaries of obedience. He's been experimenting with "I don't want to" and "Why?" in response to my commands, I mean requests. Well yesterday he pulled out the "NO". The flat out refusal to comply obviously wasn't successful, so it quickly turned sour. He threw up his arms and slackened his posture in defeat and looked at me sincerely and said:

"I am so tired of always having to do what you say."

AAAaaaahhhhhh . . . truth. I laughed heartily, then sat back and appreciated his honest self-awareness and articulation. He stripped away any potential screaming and crazy futile frustration (brought on by his lack of control over most of his circumstances) and simply stated the truth, the motivation for his behavior. He wants to make more choices for himself.

He's 5 on Sunday and maybe I need to give him more opportunities to feel some control in his little life. But dang - that was funny.

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Dalton is a picky eater, no bones about that. Well last night at dinner he told me something that I actually wasn't sure about.

The setting: dinner, where I had prepared spaghetti squash as a side and was attempting to coerce the chillins to partake. I was shameless and Dalton looked at me with a matter-of-fact tone and said:

"You know, Mom, as you get older you lose taste-buds, so you don't mind eating vegetables as much. "

I actually paused and had to think. Is this true? Darren says heck no - you don't lose any, just maybe some sensitivity loss, but I have yet to look it up. I mean I have had my tastes change quite a bit as I've gotten older to include a lot more veggies, legumes, etc. He may be on to something, but I still won't let him off the hook at dinnertime.

It was pretty smooth if it was totally fabricated. Scary. And if not, where did he learn this? He didn't remember.